Talking grief
“Pooja ,there is a sad news,” said Twisha while sitting to have lunch with Pooja. Both the girls worked in the same office though different departments. Over the last two years they had become good friends and made it a point to have lunch together everyday.
“Monica has lost her baby. She’s had a miscarriage yesterday night”.Twisha told Pooja. Monica worked in Twisha’s department and was going through a difficult pregnancy. She was confined to bed for the past fortnight. Munching on her salad ,sadly Pooja asked, “Are you going to see her ?” “I want to but am not sure.Many here in the office very strongly feel that Monica should be left to herself for now and we should visit her only after a few days. What do you think I should do Pooja?”Twisha asked pensively.Pooja paused for a moment and replied, “I’d go if I were you .” “ Would’nt that be intruding on one’s privacy in a not so happy situation ?” asked Twisha a bit unsurely. “ May be, may be not ..I’d choose to go for the ‘may be not’ option”,replied Pooja . “I feel reaching out to our close ones at the time of grief is essential on our part. If it is not taken well by the concerned person, we can always apologize and back out, without feeling guilty about it,” she added, “ if you decide to go, I’d like to go with you”. “ Okay then let’s go today evening,” Twisha had made up her mind.
In the evening both the girls reached the hospital where Monica was admitted. Twisha carried a big bouquet of beautiful lilies, Monica’s favourite. They went straight to her room, knocked and went in. Monica smiled at them .Her eyes had tears. Twisha went to her and hugged her tight. A few moments later the girls sat near her bed and held her hand. Monica just started talking of how the day was the saddest day in her life, how she did not know what to do to ease the blinding pain in her heart that was almost choking her, of how much she was looking forward to holding her baby and on and on she went. Sameer, her loving husband, also spoke so naturally about the tragedy that had struck them so mercilessly, that it was amazing how such sad emotions, personal things could be spoken of so uninhibitedly. Twisha and Pooja stayed there for quite some time listening, talking. The door opened and a nurse walked in with soup for Monica. It was time to leave. Twisha and Pooja wished Monica a speedy recovery and left her to rest. Monica and Sameer thanked them genuinely for their visit and expressed their gratitude for the thoughtfulness.
On way back Pooja and Twisha discussed how nice it was that they had gone to see Monica.They knew that their visit, for sure had helped Monica get an outlet to the storm raging inside her. They realised that may be talking grief is the best way of dealing with it.
We try to suppress our grief, hide it with various justifications but talking grief is dealing with it head on and hence is the most effective.Talking grief not only helps the sufferer but also strengthens the bond between the close ones. Alongside, it also makes us stronger and compassionate. By talking grief, we make ourselves available to our loved ones, in their time of need.The earlier we talk grief, the better it is. It is indeed a very important step towards MOVING ON.
Hello Readers,
we all feel differently in so many ways. It would really be nice to get your feed back ,your views on the subject and suggestions for my writing . Thank you for your time and interest.
